yuletide_coal | The Dirty Energy Source

The Dirty Energy Source

Do you want to make a spreadsheet about spreadsheets?
Do you still need to figure out what two other fandoms you should request beside the only one you really want fic for?
Or are you trolling ALL the letter posts for placeholders, just so you can write those people some nice, dry coal?

We want to know all about it.

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http://slr2moons.dreamwidth.org/196518.html

The canon for Owari no Seraph | Seraph of the End has a post-apocalyptic setting! People over ~14 years old have been wiped out by a mysterious disease, leaving only children and helpful hungry vampires in the world. Canon is still in early days for worldbuilding!

OP

Oh, excellent. Much better.

NA, +1. It's an amazing novel and I've written for it but it's not something you want to pick up FOR Yuletide.

Oh Holy Lord dying

Even better if X, Y, and Z were the only characters nominated, or if you requested "Any" but X, Y, and Z were in the tag set.

AYRT--yep! People mentioned mining, dental practices, etc. if they could work them in.

DA

A subtle reference to mining, though I haven't seen any yet this year :( In the past people have also used dentistry/valet jokes for sock account letters but that is not recommended this year as the mods may be on the lookout.

AYRT

I don't think so, they seemed pretty unaware of most things. But since they took the time to lovingly trash a character who is pretty much the only 'good' guy of the lot, I think they knew exactly what they were doing.

Too obvious/honest. "No X, Y, Z, I just don't find them interesting for some reason."

lol. You win.

if i don't like it i won't comment

Oh my god, it's perfect.

ayrt

You're right, of course.

ayrt

That sounds like fun, though. :D At least the mining, if not the dentists. Or the sex with house elves.

DA

Not a cricket coalie, but they wrote six fics last year, including some excellent fic for me, and they deserve absolutely all the treats.

Dear Yuletide Writer,

First, there are a few things you should know about me. I find reading bad writing very traumatic; it is actually physically painful to read. If you think your writing is not of a very high standard, please feel free to default as I'm sure you won't want to make Yuletide an unpleasant experience for me.

I wish I could say that Yuletide is the highlight of my year, but in truth, for the past few years I've found other fic exchanges which are more enjoyable. I think it is the quality of fic - now that Yuletide has grown so big, a lot of sub-par writers have joined in. Again, please default if you consider your writing to be sub-par, or even - no, especially - if you believe I might consider your writing to be sub-par. For comparison's sake, I enjoy strong, emotive writing - think Dostoyevsky, Camus, Dan Brown. I consider modern short stories to be bastards of the true genius of classic short stories and loathe the very name of Katherine Mansfield. If you need to emulate a good writer it would probably be best for you to stay away from female "authors" altogether.

As for my likes, I believe that prose should be beautiful but understated. It shouldn't be "plot-driven" - it ought to be written out of a love of language itself. So-called "shipping" is an anathema to me because it is never about story, but about "relationships" - I've requested just one character for each of my "fandoms" because I want you to focus on creating something beautiful for me. It would be deeply upsetting to me if you included more than one character in any of the stories.

I dislike fics which are over 30,000 words, but I require a minimum of 27,000. You are not truly a writer if you believe you can say anything worthwhile in less words than that.

Reveals would be AMAZING. I'd do an obnoxiously glowing rec post in honor of the herculean effort.

Most likely to stop the non-treat crowd (aka most of the participants) from complaining about someone stealing their thunder by writing their assignment early.

Basically, it's to encourage focus on assignments-- hence letters remain firmly "unofficial"

Mrs. Todd's Shortcut, a short story by Stephen King! It's in his Skeleton Crew short story collection.

An elderly caretaker of summer homes in Bangor, Maine, tells his friend of Mrs. Todd and her obsession with finding the shortest route between Bangor and Castle Rock, where she and her husband lived for most of the year. Her shortcuts grow progressively shorter, until they do the impossible and shrink beneath even as-the-crow-flies distance. The caretaker notices Mrs. Todd is changing due to her obsession, and he isn't sure it's a good thing. But he finds it fascinating all the same.

One of my personal favorite stories!

da

So... you don't think they were aware of what they were doing, but you think they knew exactly what they were doing?

More art!

That sounds amazing, and now I want to read it. I should check my library. A book of King short stories would be great for this time of year anyway.

Dear Writer,

One thing first: I have a LOT of tiny fandoms, but I'm not actually a big fic reader! I'd absolutely love it if you could do fanart, podfic, fanvids, or some other general visual thing instead of just fic! If I see a wall of text with no pictures to break it up, I might have trouble reading it, sorry!

dooooo iiiiiiit

I can't answer the OOC question, but it looks like what the requester really wants is fic that hews very close to the canon.

Truth? If I liked their fandoms, the only thing I'd find off-putting about this letter is the "no first person POV". Then again, maybe all of the relevant canon here is in third person. Personally, I'm not a fan of second person POV, but first person usually works for me. I can't think of a story I've read in first person that would have been any better in third person.

I'd write the OOC bit off as cluelessness (a lot of people who do OOC don't know they're doing it) and some of the DNWs off either as a noob unreasonably afraid of getting those things or an old-timer who's been burned in the past.

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The Dirty Energy Source

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