I think aces/aros/etc are fine as an identity. I am not sure why they keep trying to shoehorn themselves in underneath the queer umbrella.

If you're ace and you want to have romantic relationships with people of the same gender, then sure, call yourself queer. If you're aro and want to fuck people of the same gender, then sure, call yourself queer. If you're ace/aro and also trans, cool, call yourself queer. But if you're cishet in all other ways than whether or not you want sex/want to have a relationship, maybe just stop trying to call yourself queer. It's not a special club you're being excluded from. FFS.